Yesterday I realised that my brother loved me. Which might seem like a weird thing. My brother Carl has always been selfish, only seems to call or appear when he wants something. Usually money. So I'm not his biggest fan. But he's my brother so I love him and he is the father to my beloved nephews so I don't want to fall out for no reason.
He called me yesterday to tell me that he won £100 on a scratch card, which is just awesome. Not surprised he called me about it. I'd tell everyone if I won that too. The cute thing though was that he actually wanted to come down to my work from his home just to SHOW me the scratch card before he got his money. At first that might seem like someone just trying to rub success in anothers face but I realised that was my brother wanting to share his achievement with me. Or kinda like how a dog or cat will present you with a toy or dead animal it may have, with a kind of need to impress their owner.
I found it sweet really, that even after years of him acting selfish and me calling him out on it, he wanted to show me something he did that I could, well, be proud or happy about.
Aw families.
I shall upload a photo of my adorning neohew Oliver when I get home. It's been too long since his happy innocent face lit up my dull blog.
I also am home alone for 3 days which is just fucking beautiful. I relish the alone time, I just could soak in it, drown in the peace and freedom or not having to bother with people for a while. I so need to actually get a decent earning job and work to getting my own flat or something. Long overdue.
I must work on my sleep some more. A lot more. I think I'm trying to torture myself with sleep deprivation. Ok, not that severe. but I got 2 hours on friday night, 4 on saturday and 4 on sunday. Considering the amount of hours I work on a weekend I'm surprised I didn't drop off at my desk either morning. Thing is, I am tired of course but I just choose not to sleep. I'd rather stay awake for hours reading until I literally feel my eyes shutting down. Even then I'll usually force myself to try again until it really is useless and I give in to sleep.
I don't understand why I do it though. I love sleep, it's completely awesome. I seem to remember dreams every single night and while some are on the scary, weird or just downwhat wrong side of dreamlife I still love having them. I just seem to want to suffer I think.
And if there are many typos in this (likely) I'm sorry. I cannot be assed to read this back though as I am quite sleepy and brain dead.
Sorry I'm boring. Tell me about your weekend please.
Ryanson
I went downtown to go to this "Music for Free" day, which was sorta required for music appreciation class
And it was horrible
Then it got to the music and it was good
And then it was meh the rest of the night.
Then I worked today.