I feel like the end is nearing on me..

No I'm not talking about death for once. I think I mean with Newgrounds.

I'm starting to really question why I come on here, why I continue to waste my life. I've wasted about 7 years of my life just being on the internet, not living, and I think I've finally had enough of it.

I feel like I don't fit in here, which might seem weird to people, because why do you need to fit in with a website full of misfits? When I see though people I've gotten to know strart to move on and get more friends, get degrees, get partners, just getting on with their lives, I feel like.. Why isn't that me?

It should be me. I'm 22 now, and I've not got anything to show for it. If I'm not careful I will indeed die alone, having nothing to show for my life except a few thousand posts on a forum.

I've always loved my solitude, my alone time. I cherish being on my own. Maybe it's because I've been on my own for years now that it's second nature to me. It shouldn't be though and I know the only way to get over it is to tackle it on head first. Be more social, be more outgoing, whatever.

I need to.

No, this isn't goodbye, this isn't even be back soon. This is just me becoming aware that someday I won't be coming back. Sure I know many people on here juggle real life well and still manage a good few hours on here most nights too, but I just don't know what the future holds for me and my life , and I probably think it is better if I can detach myself from Newgrounds somehow, so that when I am ready to do more living (which I am attempting now) I won't be worried about BP points or what the guys in Stickam are up to or what great flash I'm missing or especially what great topics I'm missing.

I don't want that anymore.

Peace.

Comments

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skarai 2010-02-04 10:11:08

Farewell!

ChampionAnwar 2010-02-04 10:37:29

Though I haven't been here long, I know this place won't be the same without you. From what I've seen, you're a very intelligent person and your knowledge could take you far and wide. When you do decide to leave NG behind, all the best for the rest of your life. . Take care of yourself Gagsy ^__^.

PeterM 2010-02-04 12:00:17

Come to Uni and become a rich accountant, we can start a LLP together

tehslaphappy 2010-02-04 18:46:32

ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff.

now i'm sad.

hithrillr 2010-02-04 18:56:05

Damn I'll say you did good. Sup. Commander with a gold whistle. Why not do a technical/game job sounds like a plan

Umay 2010-02-05 16:35:23

God speed Gagsy, god speed.

Conal 2010-02-05 20:00:45

Well, you're aware. But you won't leave.

DragonFyre9 2010-02-05 22:58:55

Or you could stay.

SouthAsian 2010-02-06 09:36:49

its sad how the veterans of this place are slowly fading away.People who Ive been so used to see in the BBS.but everyone must come to some sort of closure.It was nice having you here because you added some degree of presence.seeing long established users is never easy.Sure its just the Internet but we haveto realize there are people on the other side of that computer.We all go tired of the same thing after awhile.Thats whats so great about humans.We constantly want to innovate and adapt to new surroundings,experiences,people,sense s, and opportunities.

Have fun in your later endeavors though.

Dew 2010-02-06 13:48:05

Well it's about time.:/ It's different when you're 16 15 14, but when you're in your 20s... Not to mention the sheer amount of time you're on here.

I'm not going to be aww come back don't leave and be a homo like that, I've been saying this sort of thing to you for a long time.

Father-of-Death 2010-02-06 18:50:13

fuck, this is actually an eye opener...

I'm happy for you! :)

Mechabloby 2010-02-07 10:29:38

lol u nurd u buy ng merch

get on msn more i dont care who u r fuk u bruv mang

JoeTheToucan 2010-02-07 13:22:26

I wouldn't be surprised that you didn't 'fit in' anywhere.

'FNARR 'FNARR

camobch0 2010-02-08 19:24:25

Please just don't leave for good, Gagsy. I'm serious, you make ng fun :).

Shikamarana 2010-02-09 01:31:20

When you leave, I leave

EmmDubya 2010-02-09 17:28:52

I've got to say that even though I'd hate it to not have you on the BBS, if you feel like you could do more with your life if you didn't have the distractions of Newgrounds then I'd say that leaving, or at least spending less time on it would probably be wise. I'm assuming that for you it's more about building up the motivation to move on, rather than figuring out whether moving on would be the right thing - that's essentially what happens to me every night that I feel I should be doing something more than lurking the BBS, although with me it's on a much smaller scale, where on my side it's about single nights and with you it's about moving forward in your life.

Anyways, I support whatever you decide to do. Good luck in whatever you end up doing.

Also, on a lighter note, I've noticed that I only live about 30 miles away from Tunbridge Wells. Never noticed how close I was.

jmalouin7 2010-02-11 06:06:50

You, Fyndir, Silver-glint, FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF all my ng friends are leaving me :(

Earfetish 2010-02-11 10:32:28

Do it. Fuck everyone who told you not to, they're not looking after what's best for you.

gamekillereater 2010-02-12 10:18:31

I'm not a misfit, and besides everyone meets someone later on in life, believe me.
And it's even easier for women, statistically speaking since there are more men than women, 51-49% to be exact.

Kwing 2010-02-12 17:54:26

You make a lot of sense. Since I'm a Flash artist, I can post stuff on Newgrounds and get feedback that could actually help build me a career if I want to do website design or professional Flash stuff, but seeing as you seem to just be hanging out, I understand why you would want to leave. If Newgrounds can't do anything for you, you probably should.

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